We like a good railway journey. In fact we like it so much that we had a funicular railway installed at Americana-UK Towers so that we could ascend from The Bunker to The Towers in proper style. Its operators, Sayid and Benin, are fully paid up members of the RMT and ASLEF respectively so we can rest assured that we are in good hands Health and Safety wise. Funny thing about the railway(s) in this country is that they are privately operated – funny because publicly owned rail systems in other countries (cf: France, Germany, The Netherlands) invest in ours and yet EU rules state that we aren’t (at present) allowed to nationalise our own. Its also odd that this system actually costs us more than if we owned them as state enterprises. On top of that some of us find it hysterically funny that there’s just been another above inflation hike in rail fares. “Funny”, as we say. On the bright side you can’t find a rabid right wing hate rag of a newspaper to read for love nor money. If you ask us we need a new Railroad Bill to go through Parliament ensuring that the railways are operated in the interests of those who actually use them…i.e. all of us.
At Americana-UK Towers we are somewhat divided about the festive season. The opportunities for falling out with each other are manifold – the correct ratio of gin to Campari to vermouth in our Negronis, whether sprouts should be considered an actual foodstuff and which Christmas tunes to play on the jukebox are just some examples. However after erecting our tree in The Bunker and given a liberal sprinkling of tinsel and cocktails we have settled on this as representative of our Christmas mindset. Thank goodness for Ray Davies…
Given recent events all comment seems superfluous…Moore, as they say, is less…
Given that, by any measure, the Brexit negotiations are an absolute dog’s dinner led by someone labelled as ‘as thick as mince’ by an ex-colleague you’d have been forgiven for thinking that things couldn’t get any worse. Then the DUP tail started wagging the Tory dog. Like they didn’t see it coming. Crikey. Obviously we at Americana-UK Towers don’t have a solution (well we did but got blind drunk and forgot it the next morning) but we are intrigued by all possibilities. Here is the ‘non-political’ ex-Beatle and band suggesting something…
This week at Americana-UK Towers we have mostly been thanking our lucky stars. Thankful that we have The Bunker to repair to in times of extremis, thankful that the code to get into the bunker is tighter than the Mac OS login system and thankful that we are blessed with a library of great tunes. Given the amount of mad, bad and dangerous people in the world it truly is amazing that we manage to keep our own sanity intact.
At Americana-UK Towers we don’t really have much truck with party politics. Granted we believe ourselves to be progressive in our outlook but essentially we pick and choose ‘policies’ according to our individual and collective wants and needs. Naturally when we repair to The Bunker things get a little reactionary – you try being holed up in a confined space with several other people whose sole purpose in life is to find banging tunes to listen to whilst getting very, very drunk. You see the conundrum. Recently we had one of our “GAS GAS GAS” drills (i.e get down to The Bunker and leave all and sundry behind as quickly as possible) and whilst waiting for the All Clear, news reached us that ‘the government’ (small ‘T’, small ‘G’ by design) had decided that Universal Credit claimants would have to wait for their money over the forthcoming festive season. It’s a five pay day month, apparently. So, y’know, sing for it you fucking paupers they appeared to say. We are not with that. We are not with the constant chipping away at the life prospects, life enhancements or sheer life possibilities of those folk whose only fault is not having enough money available to them to live anything like a comfortable life. Things seem to be taken away bit by bit. And, of course, every little bit hurts.
Fairly soon there is to be a major celebration which happens at the same time every year. Here at Americana-UK we fall fairly evenly into two camps – those that consider it the most wonderful time of the year and those that consider that we have fallen under the jackboot of emotional fascism. Obviously our differences are settled as soon as we repair to The Bunker for pints of sweet sherry and crème de menthe chasers. We were surprised to learn that one major retailer had come under fire for having the temerity to suggest it was ok to partake in the celebrations if you were other than white (and we assume Christian). How sad. This tune makes us feel better.
We were intrigued this week when all of the talk was about paradise and papers. Obviously Americana-Uk Towers is its own little paradise and The Bunker is an oasis of calm in a world of madness. That said we do like to pay our taxes and Vaclav and Tomasz, who put the bunker in for us, are fully unionised and known to the tax authorities. So we are squeaky clean. The duty-free we consume is fully above board and needn’t concern anyone else. What we can’t help wondering though is that if everybody (including the super-rich) paid what they morally owe then how much better it would be for us all…350 million for the NHS anyone? Nothing is new under the sun we like to say and this little ditty from well over thirty years ago somewhat proves our point.
Insulated as we are deep in the bunker of Americana-UK Towers from the worst effects of modern life we can’t help but be deeply troubled about the reports reaching us of abuse. Abuse, it seems, that has become rife in all areas – politics, entertainment, you name it. Is it just men perpetrating this? Probably not. Is it mostly men? Probably. How utterly depressing. We have a simple message: just stop it, show some respect, grow up, stop giving the rest of us a bad name. This then is for you, whoever you are (with added Portugese subtitles for no reason whatsoever)
When we came round from the effects of one of our all too regular Bacchanalia some months ago we were surprised to find that we had decided to divorce our partner(s) in the European Union. The UK in our moniker Americana-UK is more of an advisory description of geographical location than a statement of nationalist intent so we could, potentially, have been Americana-EU. No matter – we are sure that people know what they are doing other wise they wouldn’t have put that stuff on the side of a bus in order to trigger our parting. As far as our limited view from The Bunker will allow this is what we assume is happening: Continue reading “Pick of the Political Pops: Paul Simon “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover””